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Dare to Be Average 🎯
"Perfectionists put themselves on the rack and torture themselves. Their lives are a constant test — and they keep failing." Burns's answer: aim for average, on purpose, as a radical act.
Today's Plan
- ☕ Catch up & popcorn20 min
- 🎯 Jeff's chapter summary10 min
- 💬 Discussion questions25 min
- 🌱 One take-away each5 min
1 · Catch Up ☕
First 20 minutes
Before we crack open the chapter, let's actually land together. Fire up the popcorn picker and — when it's your turn — share whatever of these feels right:
- How was your week?
- What were you up to?
- What questions are on your mind right now — big, small, random?
(No right answers. No performance required. This is the Dare-to-Be-Average portion of the agenda.)
2 · Jeff's Summary 🎯
10 minutes
Jeff walks us through Chapter 14 — the main ideas, the exercises worth doing, and whatever grabbed him most.
3 · Discussion Questions 💬
25 minutes
Pick the ones that feel interesting — no need to go in order.
- Where does your perfectionism show up most? Work, relationships, appearance, a hobby, how your home looks on a Saturday morning?
- When did you first learn that "good enough" wasn't good enough? Who was teaching that — explicitly or by example?
- Burns lists the hidden costs of perfectionism (procrastination, paralysis, less enjoyment, often less quality too). Which of these do you recognize in yourself?
- Is there something you've avoided doing because you couldn't do it perfectly? What would it look like to do it badly on purpose?
- Burns talks about "process vs. product" — enjoying the doing, not just the finishing. Where in your life do you get this right already? Where is it missing?
- What's one low-stakes thing you could do averagely this week, deliberately? (Mediocre cooking. Unpolished text. Leaving a task at 70%. Sending the draft.)
- If your self-worth weren't tied to your output, what would you stop doing? What would you start?
4 · One Take-Away 🌱
Last 5 minutes
Around the group, one sentence each:
- One thing you're taking with you from today.
- One "average" thing you'll let yourself do this week.
Notes from the session
Filled in after we meet